Praying #bittertweets with @Pontifex

@Pontifex Screenshot 3

@Pontifex

When I heard that Pope Benedict XVI opened a Twitter account my first thought was not positive.  In fact it was more panic than prayer: What are you thinking, Holy Father?! The wolves on Twitter will rip you apart!

Sometimes fears are well founded. Before a creature was twittering in the Papal household, insults began flowing in like floodwaters bursting though broken levees (you can flip through all the tweets that mention “pontifex” by clicking here – some of them are tough). It was evident that not everyone wanted the Pope to be keystrokes away.  Or maybe in a strange way they did, because without this nearness no one could have tossed these cold barbs directly at him, expecting him to hear (and be wounded by?) them.

To my family, the Pope, despite being a white guy, is more family than family.  He’s like our grandfather, and the idea of taunting and mocking our 85-year-old grandfather just doesn’t enter our imagination.  Which is why it hurts – even made me angry.  The only thing I could think to do was, through the insults and vulgarities, to pray some Angry Prayers.

Once I got started down the road of praying through my own reactions, something strange happened — I started to get the sense that, in some strange way, all these angry tweeters were praying angry prayers themselves.  Maybe that’s giving some of these too much credit, but I’d rather err on that side than the other, and when read with compassion, I felt like many of them were petitioning for something themselves. So, I started praying not just against them, but with them.

What came out, for better or worse, was a little psalm.  Fair warning: some of the tweets were not easy to read.  Still, I entrust it to your good hearts.

***

God, I am angry with You for not existing, or for existing without listening.

 

Yet in bone chilling, soul aching, body shaking desperation, I cry my needs to You day and night because only Your Silence is awake at this time.

 

Even in my own agony I lift up my eyes and see that you have abandoned the ones closest to You.

 

The more I hate You for being so far away, the closer You draw near.  The closer You draw near, the further I try to push you away.

 

And when You finally tweet me Your Word, I will silence It, waiting for another.

 

***

The Pope himself has said that insults can lead to the Church’s purification; now @Pontifex can take all the sentiments twittered at him and keep them close to his heart as he offers up his prayers.

Strange as it may be, writing this prayer and praying with all this anger made me hope no one deletes these “prayers” before they reach Pope Benedict’s ears.

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